This is the first of a series: WHAT I DID THIS SUMMER.

When I was 10 my mother, a fifth-grade teacher then, went with two fellow teachers on a two-week summer teacher certification trip to California and Hawaii. The trio were able to get state teaching accredited hours toward geography and history. It seemed a big trip to me with my mother gone for two weeks. My father seemed to fix hamburgers every night and by the fourth night setting the table with ketchup and mustard I was wishing I was along with my mom in the lush tropics, this place of glamor and excitement. It’s where the Brady family went on a work vacation and even the Angels found trouble in Paradise!

Okay, observant readers. I’m missing JUST ONE Charlie’s Angels trading cards to finish the beach scene. I need card #158 if anyone knows where there stash or their sister’s stash of 30-year-old cards are stored.

But my sister and I (also a big Charlie’s Angels fan during this time. I was always Sabrina) were well rewarded with the most intoxicating and seemingly exotic souvenirs my mother brought back. And from that day on with my swishy hula skirt, my Crazy Shirt souvenir T-shirt and smelling so sophisticated in my heavenly plumeria/Whisteria/guava fragrance, I vowed I’d make it to Hawaii to see the islands for myself.

Strangely (or maybe not so) my husband had regularly covered the Pro Bowl until the year I started dating him. I kept thinking he’d cover another Pro Bowl but it seemed we were always busy in January anyway. Finally, last year, sensing that our daughters might be mature enough to handle the eight-hour flight, I talked Joe into a trip to Hawaii. He’d been before and (as I later learned about him and the rest of the family) wasn’t all that excited about sand.

So the second week of June, we headed out on a plane bound for the middle of the Pacific. We chose Maui mainly because that’s where a timeshare was open. Plus it seemed like a doable place with sites to see and lots of restaurants so we didn’t have to fish for our own food. (We weren’t inviting my father the fisherman.) Maui was a plus for great eats, I’d researched and memorized all the kid-friendly places in the Frommer’s “Hawaii with Kids” my friends Ed and Annette loaned me. (That list of great eats to come.)

But early on, I noticed that I was the only one truly excited to get up early and race to the beach. My husband seemed to need to check the Internet. I learned our definitions of “vacation” were different. The girls were on another itinerary as well. They craved the pool and if the beach was on the way to the pool, fine. If not, the water in the pool was treated and didn’t have sand.

“The sand is scratchy, Mom.”  “Are you kidding me?” I’d reply. I love the beach, the sound of the waves, the lure of treasure getting swept up on the shore moment after moment. I love leaving my footprints in the sand, I love the scritchy feel of sand between my toes. I love the feel of waves splashing over my legs, the linger of a salt-kissed, fishy smell — that beach scent Kramer wanted to sell. I love looking out into the horizon, awe-inspired that water picks up and makes it’s own way far from my vantage point.

And my dear, dear crazy family, wasn’t buying any of that nonsense.

Part Two coming soon…

We just went new shoe shopping and here’s what my daughters picked out. No scuffs, yet. I’m learning my daughters have very different shopping styles.

Within five minutes of entering the store, my youngest had already spotted and tried on two different pairs of shoes, opting for the first pair with a great set of lights. (I counted there’s 18 flashes of light per foot per step. Wonder how long til I get a call from her teacher.) It was bonus that they didn’t feature actual shoelaces. I think actual long laces might have fried the shoe’s circuitry. And tying shoes is not a skill she’s learned yet, and won’t be able to accomplish quickly now that her shoes don’t force her to learn.

Katie sat patiently with her arm resting on her new shoes’ box while I dealt with her older sister. Liz tried on the same brand she had last year. (She got high tops last year which were hard to tie and hard to get on and finally she just quit wearing.) I did have her try on a pair of canvas Chuck Taylors in red. The low-cut version not the high tops, though it brought back my days of playing on my junior high basketball team. Man, I could really run fast in those days. Maybe it WAS the shoes. (I realize I’m dating myself here, again.)

Liz looked like a clown in those red shoes. Next she tried on another pair of high-fashion canvas low-cut shoes with a rose dangling from the side. Still not right. Plus I didn’t think they’d work for P.E. class. I steered her toward the modernized Nike line of shoes, pointing out that was what I was wearing at that moment.

She tried on a few pairs, turning up her nose as she gingerly walked around the bench. “Get them off! Get them off! I don’t want new shoes. I can wear what I have. Let’s just leave, I want to give up.”

Liz did not grow up when Nike was advertising that their shoes made you do just the opposite. She is not a product of the “Just do it” era. To her way of thinking the mesh shoes with pink swooshes were unappealing. Does Nike think ALL girls just HAVE TO HAVE pink!?!?! How about magenta and purple and orange? Colors that actually match school colors?

I told her we were not giving up but unfortunately since her grandparents were not Italian shoemakers she could not be picky and desire the perfect shoe be hand sewn for her. She’d have to opt for something in the store because her current shoes on her feet were not getting approved for school wear by this momma.

Meanwhile, Katie quietly waited beside her shoebox as Liz desired to leave the store with her ragged shoes. I pointed out the Puma shoes and told Liz how my most favorite shoes from school were the pair of sleek, all-white Puma spikes I had for my junior year in high school track. They were the best shoes of my short run as a high school athlete. But waxing nostalgia did not help Cinderella, my child who was not having a ball. (Speaking of Cinderella, here’s a great resource for various titles on the Cinderella theme.)

Finally we spotted Liz’s size, 13.5 in sensible all-leather shoes. I told her she could indeed jump in mud puddles with these. This was one of her own requirements for her perfect pair of shoes. One choice was a purple-starred Converse shoe and beside it a more fashionista all-leather shoe with “Rhino” and “Red” in block letters with a shiny turquoise back. She tried them both on. The Converse shoes made her jump, as if for joy. The next pair indeed put her back on top of the world. She opted for the second pair with a little bit more flair (see above). I told her it pays not to give up because she (finally) found a decent pair of shoes for running in PE (that made me happy) that also was a fashion statement and sturdy enough for jumping in puddles (that made her happy.)

We returned from the grand city that is the one and only New York City.

To our friends who we missed seeing on this trip, know that we shall return. We took in a show but when my husband whispers at intermission that he’s not understanding what’s going on, then I’m sure we’ve overpaid for tickets. My husband is a guy who follows Bill James‘ logic and statistics, so if he cannot understand interpretive dance set to familiar music it might be more than a problem with costumes.

Despite the rather questionable Saturday matinee it was a good trip. Frankly I cannot complain because I get to write those entertaining words: Saturday matinee. I feel jazzed just by the notion of an event to get dressed up for on a Saturday afternoon. It’s a great time between lunch and dinner out. Lunch, naturally has to be at a classic Jewish deli with lots of half sour pickles. I order an egg cream and a HALF order of the corned beef sandwich on rye. I’ve finally realized I like corned beef and NOT pastrami. For YEARS we’ll go to a restaurant and I’d look over the menu and ask my husband the same question: “Do I like the pastrami or the corned beef?” It’s got to have spicy mustard, a potato cake on the side with apple sauce. No sour cream because it’s gross and and no Mayonnaise like the out-of-towners requested at the table right beside us. Oh, and it’s not a good deli if you’re not practically sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with strangers. If you’ve not heard of the Carnegie Deli you’ve not researched the city enough. (The Stage is just south of there if the Carnegie line is too long. And I also like the Upper West side’s Artie’s Deli.

We’ve only hit the tip of the iceberg (lettuce salad with Thousand Island Dressing) with adventures in food on our trips to the city.

Speaking of the Titanic, Carmine’s boasts a Titanic Ice Cream Sundae sure to sink any diet. (I’m sure I’m not the first to use this pun.) Think six scoops of ice cream just as the base. This landmark remains one of our favorites (go with a hungry group because the family-style portions are huge) but our new fave Italian restaurant is Basso 56 where the homemade pasta is incredible.

We also love the real city feel at The Odeon. I’ve eaten so many horrid, greasy undercooked McDee’s French Fries that I am thrilled that there are still locations on the planet that know how to cook up an glorious batch of fries.

Thanks to the creative choices offered up by our friends Leigh and Ed (note to Richard, you select too many chains to get a mention under “creative”) select an new place each time. We chose Nuevo Latin-inspired Calle Ocho. Since I’m learning Spanish, with really means I cannot pronounce anything remotely understandable I can identify perhaps five foods in this second language. And I knew the restaurant means Eighth Street despite its location on Columbus Avenue.

So, next time I’ll share our daughter’s fave food places in New York City. In the meantime, feel free to share YOUR favorite places to dine in NYC. As always I look forward to reading your comments.

When Joe was in South Africa his bag had this note from Liz, age 8:

It reads: “The fish in your bag is named Love. Take her everywhere and take pick’s (pictures) with her. OK?”

Usually I remind the girls to put a small stuffed animal or a storybook in their father’s suitcase when he’s going for a long trip. (We once tape recorded Joe reading a storybook for Liz to watch when she was little and now we have the wonders of Skype to do real time video conferencing!)

This note was a new twist that Liz thought up by herself. She also leaves notes for the Tooth Fairy along with the tooth but she has become worried that she won’t loose any more baby teeth. She’s only lost eight!

Liz’s handwriting needs a little practice, so I need to think up ways to get her to write notes more often. (Maybe if I leave her unfinished notes or notes on what to leave notes about. Hmmmmm?)

So Love is the lovely fish in the top photo, resting or something after her 16 hour flight from America to South Africa this past month. And here is the Love the fish flying through the air in the lovely tourist town of Cape Town, South Africa.

Mission accomplished! A well traveled fish and a happy daughter, who also got a pink vuvuzela and some beautiful beaded necklaces from Africa as well.

NEXT PORT OF CALL: My mother found a LABO Exchange Student Handbook from the early 80s when my family hosted a young girl (I was a young girl then, too) from Japan. The handbook has lots of great stuff so it’s our next destination after I finish our “What we did over the summer” post. Stay tuned for recipes and cultural insight from Japan coming later this month!

Seems there’s a spanish dip called romesco with nuts, tomatoes, olive oil and red peppers, but this similar Cooking Light dip might make it’s way on our bar during the big game. The magazine lends more inspiration in this article here. So with some flatbread and pitas, veggies and omelets, I think that lends some sunny espanol flavor!

The Dutch food guide for about.com says apple sauce is common on the Dutch plate, so apple sauce will likely find it’s way on our dessert table! The holiday cookie of the Netherlands is called speculaas (a spiced cookie that is usually in the shape of windmills. The recipe calls for pumpkin pie spice, which I just happen to have in my pantry! Here’s another recipe that seems similar at all.recipes.com

For decorations, I wonder if my local Costco will have some Holland tulips for the dessert bar and I’ll get my daughters to help me make vibrant, large tissue-paper flowers for the tapas bar and room! I might need to find some cheap orange crocs (if there is such a thing as CHEAP crocs!) to fill in for the fabulous orange Dutch clogs! And we’ve got the real vuvuzelas for decoration, if not actual game-time party horn as we cheer/eat/work during the final with the Netherlands and Spain.

My family and I were on vacation in Hawai’i’ (check back next time to read how my Midwestern family survived a week in the middle of the Pacific!). That’s where I found Susan’s second cookbook, Hawai’i’s Bento Box Cookbook, Second Course. The girls and I were mesmerized with the adorable offerings such as Acorn Girl Sandwich, Mr. Smiley Musubi and other whimsical characters made from food! It’s kid-friendly lunches look amazing. Much better than the typical lunches I’d been trying to pull off!

I need tips NOW before the pressures of back-to-school lunch making hits, so I asked Susan to be our guest as we explore Hawai’i'an culture and bento boxes! Susan grew up in Hilo, Hawai’i', and now lives in Honolulu with her family. Susan has a great ideas on bringing the tropics to mainland ‘Ohanas/families!

MARGO: I always struggle to look beyond a boring sandwich for lunch. Where do you find inspiration for your amazing bento box characters?

SUSAN: Before writing the cookbooks, I would just ask my daughter, Paige, what she would like in her bentos and then go from there. But now that I do the cookbooks, I love to go to kitchen supply or even craft stores to find inspiration. I like to look for things like cookie cutters, picks, stencils or molds.

I just recently rediscovered my drawer of cookie cutters where I think there MIGHT be some potential, even for me! When did the thought first occur to you that you could transform meals into something truly creative?

SUSAN: When Paige (who is 8 now) started preschool, her classmate’s mom would make these really amazing character bentos. I had never seen anything like that before and I was just floored by all of the things that she made. Paige asked if I could make her a bento like the ones her classmate had, and that’s how I started! It’s been over 4 years now, and I still really enjoy making them.

What were your favorite lunches when you were growing up? Was your mom into decorating your meals? And what kind of food traditions are you passing along to your children?

SUSAN: My mom would pack us bento lunches for field trips. She would always make us fried chicken, musubis, tamago along with a frozen drink and fruit as well. She never decorated our food, but our food was always arranged with care, and the food was always delicious.

My mom was/is a great cook and she really had given me an appreciation for food from when I was very young. I always helped her in the kitchen, which is what Paige does. Paige loves to (help me) cook and wants to be a chef/marine biologist when she grows up. What I hope to pass on to Paige is a love and appreciation for food — enjoying the foods of different cultures, places, and regions, and incorporating that into her own cooking.

How long does it take to make many of the lunches in your cookbooks? Do you make lunches the evening before to save time in the morning? Any other tips for making meals a snap?

SUSAN: The bentos in my cookbook can take anywhere from 1 hour to only 5-10 minutes to prepare. The sandwiches are always the easiest and then some things like stews or soup, I reheat in the morning and send hot in a Thermos-like container. Otherwise, I will cook everything fresh that morning just because I worry about the food spoiling since most of the time Hawai’i’ is so hot and humid. I do prep everything the night before so all I have to do is cook and pack it.

I think most people would pack their children sandwiches since it is the quickest and easiest to do. Cookie cutters are the easiest way to make a sandwich fun.

Besides designing adorable creations, what are some tricks for getting children to try new things? For our family new things would be nori and SPAM.

SUSAN: I would say to start off with small quantities and incorporate it into things that they already like to eat. Adding thin strips of nori to Japanese type soups or noodles (hot or cold).  You could decorate food with them too, maybe just a few tiny pieces for the face are pretty tasteless. With SPAM maybe slice it thin, fry it, and put it in a club sandwich in place of bacon.  You could also cut it up small and put it in an omelet, fried rice or even in mac and cheese.  Then maybe even a SPAM musubi!

Right now I’m trying to get my family to eat more whole grains, so I have been incorporating things like barley, bulgur wheat, and quinoa into soups and stews as well as in our rice. I started off with small quantities of the grains and over a period of a couple of months I kept increasing it until they got used to seeing it in the food. I’ve have also been making bread in a bread machine and try to add in whole grains that way too.

I need to get back into the habit of using my bread machine, too. We love to recreate festive meals from different countries and regions, like making homemade pizza on Italian Night — even though pizza was technically discovered in New York City! What should be on our menu for the quintessential “Hawai’i'an Night?” What type of pupus/appetizers would keikis/kids enjoy?

SUSAN: I would say to stick with kid-friendly foods and then add some Hawai’i'an flair. Instead of just serving kalua pork, make them kalua pork quesadillas or BBQ kalua pork sliders (mix in the BBQ sauce with the pork), or even have ham (maybe even SPAM later!) with pineapple pizzas. Kids love food on a stick so it might be fun to do shish kabobs with Teriyaki chicken chunks with pineapple or even pulehu steak kabobs with Maui onions. Another thing might be loco mocos — a hamburger patty on top of rice with an egg, and gravy all over the top.

I almost tried the loco moco just for the name, but wasn’t sure about that egg on top of a burger! What are some of your ‘Ohana’s favorite books and music about Hawai’i'?

SUSAN: I listen to Na Leo Pilimehana and Jake Shimabukuro. I also have two wonderful friends, DeShannon Higa (Bop Tribal) and Rocky Brown, who are extremely talented recording artists as well. As for books, I love the children’s book, “How the B-52 Cockroach Learned How to Fly” by Lisa Matsumoto. It’s a really cute story and very funny.

It seems there are many artists on Hawai’i’. Your bento boxes are art, too! What about Island life helps the most with creativity?

SUSAN: I would say the food! They are so many different cultures with wonderful food that it’s easy to love to eat, try new things and want to cook.

Thanks for your time, Susan! Enjoy your summer. I miss those great trade winds already! I need to break out the pineapple for the start of our own island dinner soon. More details to come! Click here to see Susan’s first cookbook of brilliant creations. Aloha, for now!

I promised my youngest daughter we could watch a movie of her choice this afternoon. Unfortunately that’s also when the USA takes on Ghana in World Cup Soccer Round Two. I’m not sure she’ll think watching soccer (football!) is a treat. She just sees me yelling and thinks I’m crazy.

IF I could find a vuvuzela for her I think that would make her excited. Joy to all but those with actual working ear drums! But I’ve read they’re not to be found in our town — which has to be a very, very good thing! Just the sound (like a BP oil-sized swarm of crazed and dazed bees) makes me think I need a malaria shot.

So if I had more time I’d bring you a meal from Ghana! Well, I can offer up these links to info about Ghana HERE! I think Ghana is a republic, but I’m not sure what that means in Africa! (I’m reading Peter Godwin’s “When a Crocodile Eats the Sun” a memoir about growing up in Zimbabwe that also hints at the unraveling of the nation under a dictator. For a chaser, I’m going to need to go back to Alexander McCall Smith’s series about the wonderfully charming and cunning Precious who runs the No. 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency.

Since cocoa is the main export in Ghana, I’ll sip some hot chocolate while watching the game. We already finished our South African Milo candy bar! (It was yummy!) Stews are also popular, but that sounds a bit too much for summer. I think a nice rice dish would suffice. (I can always find a bag of rice in the deep recesses of my frig, since I’m not likely going to make it to the grocery store!)

So for the 2:30 p.m. (Central Daylight Time) Saturday (June 12) clash of England versus U.S.A. we bring you the best of England.

TUNES: Pick a British band, just make sure they’re from the mainland of England and NOT Wales or Scotland! Also see the Wikipedia entry for football chants here!

I had no idea the English teams had so many variations of songs. But I do recall a lot of face-painted, clog-wearing, country-flag draped, beer-in-hand jolly fans SINGING and CHANTING throughout the stadium when I was at the 1994 World Cup qualifying in Orlando at the Citrus Bowl. Forget the teams on the field, there’s as much electricity and festivity in the stands and in the crowds of FOOTBALL FANS streaming to and from the stadium.

BACKGROUND READING: First, a tip of the hat to good friend Chuck Culpepper (We miss you Chuck! Come visit!) who wrote about learning the nuances of English soccer. Click here to buy Chuck’s book!

EATING: Anything by Jami Oliver is a great start! Bigger bookstores have Jamie magazine, which is fun to read because of the recipes calling for mililiters and grams and anchovy fillets. And the turn of phrases which are oh-so-colourful like mum, meringues, cottoned on, peas, lovely, chutneys, courgettes, programme, gasman, milkman, fish pie and the like. Yet not as strange as my butchering of proper English probably sounds to the English!

Anyway, my fave new cookbook right now is undoubtedly Jamie’s Food Revolution. It’s fabulous! In the first week I received the cookbook (thanks dear Hub) I made half a dozen recipes. My daughters were to the point of exclaiming, “What’s for dinner? Bet it’s something from Jamie Oliver.” After watching his Food Revolution I got to the point of replying “Yes loves, et is” in a very bad English accent.

FILMS: I think “My Fair Lady” might be a nice movie when the girls get tired of watching football.

RECIPES: Check out Emeril LaGasse’s recipe for Toad in the Hole — a very English breakfast popover from his Th

ere’s a Chef in My World! cookbook. I love the name!

For lunch try Jamie’s Mini Shell Pasta with a Creamy Smoked Bacon and Pea Sauce (from page 52 in his new cookbook.) We swapped turkey bacon for the richer stuff.

And for dessert, try Emeril’s Summer Pudding with white bread (or challah bread) and lots of berries. I suggest trying a classic pudding, it was the one thing I liked when I ordered dinner at the famous Rules restaurant in London. (So I didn’t realize the kidneys in the steak and kidney pie were REAL kidneys. I thought perhaps they might be referring to kidney BEANS. No such luck!)

But for this tamer, pure English menu, it might be enough to get us to root for England!

MENU: Mambo Italiano Homemade Pizza

RECIPES: Impasto Per Pizza (Fresh Pizza Dough) and Salsa Di Pomodoro (Toscana’s Homemade Tomato Sauce)

AFTER DINNER READ: “Pete’s A Pizza” by William Steig (author of “Shrek” and other fine children’s books)

So as promised, here’s the recipe for a quick and simple homemade pizza. I used to dump some ingredients in my bread machine for pizza — my sister’s trick — but it seemed to take advance planning. It was always hard for me to remember an hour before dinner to get the dough ready, but that’s an option. Most bread machines should have their own pizza dough recipes.

This recipe is from the Toscana cookbook by Kathie & Amy Gordon with James O. Fraioli. Thanks to Linda and Al for the cookbook!

I’ve halved the recipe since the original makes 8 (10-inch) pizzas. Fans of pizza we are, but I don’t like to have a lot of dough leftover. I usually use 2/3 of this smaller batch and save the rest to bake as a flatbread for an afternoon snack the next day.

IMPASTO PER PIZZA

1 cup warm water
5/8 teaspoon of dry yeast
1/2 teaspoon of salt
5/8 teaspoon of sugar
1 Tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
3 cups Italian “OO” Flour*

*Here are a few links for “OO” Flour: Antico Molino Caputo pizza flour imported from Naples, Italy; or King Arthur’s Italian Style Flour. As a Kansas-bred baker I must add that for quick meals and still good results I use a lovely and light Kansas flour mill product called Hudson Cream. There is debate on other Web sites if the imported flour impartes a better taste but I’d like to experiment! The cookbook’s note states that the “OO” flour is what pizza bakers in Italy use and that the “OO” means the flour has been finely ground making a softer consistency and supple texture that will yield a crispier crust.

DIRECTIONS:  First I’ll set a pizza pan (I need to get a pizza stone though) and set that in the middle rack of the oven set to 500 degrees. The cookbook suggests the stone or pan needs to heat for 30 minutes in the oven.

In a mixing bowl, add the warm water, yeast, salt, sugar and olive oil, and whisk until the yeast is dissolved and activated (about 2 minutes.) Pour the mixture into a mixer using the dough hook (I LOVE using my dough hook, it always reminds me of Captain Hook in Peter Pan), and set to slow speed. Add the flour. When all the flour is added, speed up the machine for 1 minute until a dough ball is formed. (Good fun for the kids to watch!) Remove the dough and place on a floured countertop and allow to rest for about 5 minutes. Divide the dough into “balls” (original recipe calls to divide into 8, but I usually do one large ball for the pizza and a smaller ball for the next day’s snack), cover with a damp cloth, and let rise for 15 minutes. The dough is now ready to use!

From here, we blare our Italian music (see my previous post) and we roll out the pizza and then just toss it in the air. The girls love this part even though it doesn’t look like the real chefs. Just the ability to throw dough in the air (and catch it, too!) is liberating. I’ll then place the dough on the hot, hot pan (since I’m not using the pizza stone) to crisp up for a few minutes before taking back out and layering on sauce (see recipe below) and other fresh ingredients. The Toscana cookbook states placing the pizza directly on the heated stone and baking at 500 degrees for approximately 6 minutes. My pizza usually takes a few minutes longer.

Don’t forget to use FRESH mozarella cheese for a great topping!

SALSA DI POMODORO (Toscana’s Homemade Tomato Sauce)

1 Tablespoon extra virgin olive oil
4 cups canned Italian tomatoes with juice (San Marzano)
1 cup water
4 fresh basil leaves 1/2 teaspoon salt
I also throw in some “Northern Italian” seasoning I found at Costco.

Heat the olive oil in a medium-size pot over medium heat. Blend the tomatoes and juice in a blender or Cuisinart until pureed. Add the water to the pot with the basil leaves and salt. Reduce heat and simmer for about 15 minutes!

Let me know in comments if you tried this recipe!

MENU: Mambo Italiano Pizza with fresh mozzarella. If you’re gonna make your own pizza, use fresh mozzarella cheese or don’t make it at all!

BACKGROUND MUSIC from my iTunes Library:

Island-inspired keiki (kid) fare is coming up, but I want to introduce our new THEME with a night that will likely become a standard at our house: Italian Night with homemade hand-tossed pizza. (I’ll provide THE easiest homemade pizza dough recipe in my next post!) Yeah, never mind that pizza really started in New York not Italy.

The BESTEST pizza in this country has to be Grimaldi’s Coal Brick-Oven Pizzeria in Brooklyn. It’s heaven on a crust. I think I’d engage in criminal activities if the reward were eating this pizza daily. I am thinking about entering a 10-mile bike ride — despite the fact I’ve NOT been training — just because they’re having pizza (not Grimaldi’s, but Spin Pizza, which is still incredible) at the finish line.

My husband hears endlessly that the only food in the world that matters is made-from-scratch, HOMEMADE or fresh-squeezed fare. I scoff at restaurants that don’t make their own lemonade! It’s not hard at all to squeeze a few lemons into water and add some sugar. Same with PB&J sandwiches, which I dread to BUY at restaurants!

And now a quick simple pizza dough I tried a few months ago that doesn’t take a lot of time to rise is allowing pizza making to become our family enterprise. Yes you too can do it without falling back on those dreaded words: DELIVERY! Check back for the recipe!

But first a bit of background. I’ve had it with those pizza delivery outfits — all of them! Notice how the guys or gals that actually appear at the door with their vinyl bags are never as happy as the delivery folk in the commercials; commercials that are rampant during the NCAA Final Four coverage. I mean how would CBS even make a profit if pizza hadn’t been invented?

The reality of pizza delivery is THIS: It NEVER tastes as good as the thought of it when you’re on the phone or online enticed with thoughts of hot, gooey cheese on perfect steamed, crisp crust with tasty toppings. Plus I’m tired of the “standard” toppings. Why not toppings that are two words like carmalized onions or pearl onions or roasted corn? Where’s the wheat crusts and the bounty of healthy vegetable toppings. I want more VARIETY not more dipping sauces.

But if you REALLY must know, it’s because of this recent delivery exchange that has me committed to NEVER calling pizza delivery again. (Unless a Spin Pizza location opens up in my area!)

Here’s what happened: We were driving home from a four-hour trip and we’re tired and hungry (bad combo always) so I used my cell phone to call our usual smaller-chain pizza place. Because I was using a new phone number I had to give them my address which they typed in and took my order but it seemed to take longer than normal.

And I’ll concede that I always have trouble pronouncing Asiago which doesn’t help but I was happy to announce that we’d be eating pizza in 20 minutes and we were still 15 minutes from home so I feel quite pleased with our meal strategy. Well, we get home and we’re there 20 minutes, then 60 minutes. No pizza.

I call the pizza place, but use our home phone, my cell phone is in my purse somewhere among the bags we’ve dragged out of the car and dropped by the garage door. I politely explain (I always try to stay polite) that we’ve waited more than an hour for our pizza. This phrase helps me get quickly directed to the manager who says, I kid you not “I’ve been waiting for your call.” He explains that the address had been typed in wrong and even though I reminded him that I’d give my full first and LAST NAME. He tells me their ordering system only recognizes phone numbers to call up addresses. (Perhaps this is because of pranksters but really getting pizza unexpectedly is better than NOT getting pizza you ARE expecting.)

I KNOW I tell him I called on my cell phone. I’m not sure if I mentioned THAT fact before or after he tells me: “We’ve been leaving messages on probably some crazy woman’s phone.” After I’m told that the order of food has sat too long and he must replace the order.

“Let’s see what specials we have,” manager says.

I’m not sure if this is code for “ask and I’ll give you a free desert,” but I’m a bit mad at this point and don’t want charity, just pizza. “I don’t want anything else,” I say, trying to stay nice, in the face of a situation brought about by bad typists. “Just place the order like we had it. How long will it be because I have two little girls who are hungry?”

(Let me tell you if you don’t have children yet, there’s nothing better than conjuring up sympathy than explaining how young and vulerable your children are to bad-service people. As if their ineptness could even help your child, but that’s beside the point. They need to help you or your home will absolutely erupt into chaos. Believe me, a long car ride and no food at 7 p.m. can do that.)

I’m told it will be 25 minutes! That makes our sublime pizza experience take another half hour, meaning a HOUR AND A HALF from the time I phoned on my cell. Yes, big mistake. Oh, and I checked my phone and there are two messages from lame pizza place. Guess that makes me the Crazy woman, who finally got pizza and breadsticks to feed her family with no real apology from the pizza place and nothing free. Not that I need anything, I on principle will not be placing ANY phone calls to ANY of the pizza chains. Thus, I’ll will soon divulge our secret for our own Italian Night without using the phone! Addio for now!