Diloneism (Di-lo-NAY-ism), noun, the misguided belief that your success is directly attributable to what is actually your biggest weakness.

The Gloaden Rule:
1. Use Ross Gload correctly, he will help your team win games.
2. Use Ross Gload incorrectly, he will get you fired.

Jeterate (JEET-ur-ayt), verb, to praise someone for something which he or she is entirely unworthy of praise.

Clemenate (KLEM-a-nayt), verb, the act of hating an athlete in an entirely healthy, fun sports way (rather than hating them in a crazed, stalking, loaded gun, insane sort of way).

Perquist [PURR-kwist], adj., a golf shot that does not go into the hole and, as such, falls short of perfection. But is still, like, a really skillful shot.

Pixifood (PIKZ-ee-food), noun: Any food substance that is highly pleasant to the taste as a child and tastes shockingly unpleasant once you become an adult.

Pribbie (PRI-bee), noun. A padded or pointless RBI, usually coming at the end of of a blowout game. Baseball fans will usually say that a player they don’t like gets a lot of pribbies.

Pozerisk (PAHZ-tur-isk), noun. An aside that has nothing whatsoever to do with anything but is thrown into the middle of the story because the author thinks it’s funny.

Tosmos (TAHZ-moze), noun, television shows that you have never actually seen but know the complete plot based entirely on commercials, word of mouth and diffusion.