Um … the Man Wall
Posted: July 7th, 2009 | Filed under: Pop Culture | 33 Comments »
Yeah, this looks like it might be a multiple mini-post day — lots of little things to catch up on. For instance, my buddy Chardon Jimmy passed along the details for the Man Wall.
Just for the record, the Man Wall has:
– Four flat screen TVs — one of those is 42 inches. I have never enjoyed watching more than one thing at once — never even liked picture-in-picture — but OK.
– A DVD player with five CD changer. I’m thinking it should have Blue Ray capacity. I had long been calling bull on the whole “Blue Ray” thing — but I have to admit that I was in a Best Buy the other day and I watched a Blue Ray movie and, yeah, uh, that’s REALLY sharp. No, I mean, really sharp.
– iPod docking station. Of course.
– A 7-foot sports ticker on top … Not sure I really need that but, yeah, I can see the appeal.
– A refrigerated beer keg. I know this will sound incredibly wimpy, but hey, it’s my Man Wall and I wonder if they can make that a Diet Coke thing?
– Microwave oven.
– Place for DVDs and such things.
– 2 cigar humidors complete with gauges. I have not smoked a cigar since my bachelor party 11 years ago, but for some reason I would still love to have this.
– 32 bottle wine rack.
Yeah, I could see having a Man Wall. For only 15 grand too … here it is all put together.
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Why have the microwave in front of the tvs? All I’m picturing is me yelling “down in front” when someone is getting their pizza rolls out.
Also… wine? I guess we’re watching cricket.
I have a buddy that has built something remarkably similar to this, but no wine rack, microwave or ticker.
Keg and five TV’s, with the DVD player and a nice stereo with surround sound.
pretty neat to see one marketed, though.
You’ll throw your back out leaning over to use that microwave.
Unless you can operate it with your feet.
The tapper needs to be next to the Lazy Boy. Who wants to stand up to get a beer?
Chicks dig wine.
The sports ticker must be programmable – how else could it show the Nationals winning a game?
Only one tap? That’s a beer failure. This is a kegerator:
http://www.homebrewtalk.com/gallery/data/1/medium/KeezerTop.jpg
5 taps of your own homebrew = beer win.
Costanza had a fridge in his chair and that was about a dozen years ago.
Jim K – that could be a hockey score, or a very early first-quarter NBA score. Or, quite possibly, the Lions found a new way to lose.
JimK @ 5:
There’s this sport called hockey. Washington has a team called the Capitals and their star player is some guy named Alex Ovechkin. You might want to check him out on youtube…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6EJ5Iwnv9w
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TjfmU5nwV4
As for the a/v system that comes with the Man Wall, idea = awesome, implementation = less than stellar.
No, It’s not the Nationals winning, it is clearly football season. I just cannot believe the Lions defense could recored a safety. But it is totally plausable that the Redskins defense could cause Dan Orlovsky to run out the back of the endzone twice already.
I liked your joke Jim.
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You were going to SHARE your Man Wall?
The whole thing looks pretty lame to me… I can think of so many things I’d rather do with fifteen grand. But maybe that’s because I’ve got breasts instead of testicles.
Anyone with 15 grand to spend on a man wall that still puts Coors Light in their kegerator deserves to have their man card revoked.
Ticker unnecessary. With that many TVs one of the screens is always going to be on a channel with a ticker running.
TVs not big enough. 42 inches should be the auxiliary TVs, not the main one. I got a 58-inch plasma on my living room wall. 42 inches looks puny to me now. 58 might actually be too big to put 4 42 around it, but I would go with a 50 in the middle and 4 42s around it.
And I think I would separately do a little wet bar witha kegerator, rather than building the kegerator into the TV wall.
Uhhh, Steve, I think the main point of this “Man Wall” is to NOT impress chicks. And Joe, I love your writing, but Diet Coke? Really? Throw down a beer my man.
And I’m with everyone else – the microwave is in a terrible spot. Instead of the microwave, that’s where I would put whatever game systems I want to hook up – Wii, XBox, etc.
Hey Joe … you should try and have Hybrid Space Furniture put a link to your blog with the other media reports on their Man Wall.
As far as the actual piece of furniture, I agree that the micro is in a bad spot, but only when having large parties. If you’re watching the game with just a few friends, it won’t matter as much. I agree with Daniel – put a PS3 or XBox … or have both!
Make the center TV bigger (50″ or so) and the others could be about 30″ to make the center one look even bigger.
I wish I had $15,000 for that.
Seems ridiculous to me but then again I’ve thought long and hard about getting a second big wall-mounted TV just for Sunday Ticket and Extra Innings, so who am I to judge?
I despise that name: “Man Wall”. I’m pretty tired of the no longer funny idea that American manhood means nothing more than zoning out with the remote and dreaming of more boobs and more beer.
I mean, I DO spend my share of time doing exactly that, but I’m still tired of being reduced to that stereotype.
Well, back in my school days my roommate and I had two TV’s on the same entertainment center so that we could play video games and watch sports at the same time.
In fact, isn’t the big failing of the Man Wall that it doesn’t have a video game system? I mean, seriously, I’m supposed to drop 15 grand on this thing but I don’t get an X-Box? Lame.
Rampant consumerism. Nobody needs all that crap. Aren’t one TV and one computer all that anybody could possibly need?
I’m no Puritan or Communist, I believe that if you earn some big bucks you have the right to enjoy it. But isn’t there a limit somewhere? Like, say, that of good taste?
Thanks Spud (#7), I was trying to be seasonal. I did like your Lions reference, and they could do it. They did manage to lose an NFL playoff game 5-0.
Chuck (#8), I’m well aware of Mr. Ovechkin; I was at the game the last time the Caps were in town. Check my website link.
“Also… wine? I guess we’re watching cricket.”
My guess, Jay B, is that you’ve never played cricket. Nor watched it.
I’m pretty confident that I could build a better man wall for under 10 grand. Why pay that much for undersized TVs? If you have that much disposable income you can do a whole lot better than that.
I agree that the ticker is pretty much useless.
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Graphite– you’re absolutely right. I was just calling out something that men don’t do, like drink wine while watching sports.
p.s. It’s a JOKE
Yeah, the ticker is gay and needs to go.
My guess, Jay B, is that you’ve never played cricket. Nor watched it.
He probably hasn’t. But then, neither has anybody else.
I’d need something stronger than wine to watch cricket. Australian Rules Football, however, is a go. Those guys are completely cracked. Bonus: that little dude in the white suit and pith helmet who runs out after scoring plays and does the Ted Lange Double-Hand Point.
I’m hard pressed to think of any sport that inspires wine drinking. Maybe some sort of cold weather sport, like ice-skating? I think cold weather sports call for hard liquor. Warm weather sports call for drinks that are frosty or iced. Maybe hacky sacking and wine-in-a-box go together. But that has nothing to do with a man wall. The wine just doesn’t seem right.
It’s a nice idea, but ultimately very stupid. #1 – If you’re well-off you’re going well above and beyond this ghetto-fabulous idea. #2 – If you have $15K to make a “man wall”, you’re making a “man room” instead and assuredly not putting the alcohol and microwave in front of the TVs. That’s like putting a concession stand in front of the movie screen. #3 – As many have mentioned, an XBOX/Playstation console is going where the microwave would anyway. #4 – What kind of person would drink Coors Light from a tap, have a microwave apart of his entertainment center, and have that crappy looking entertainment center while have the capacity for 32 bottles of wine. Talk about worlds colliding.
It’s a nice idea, but totally dumb.
Jay B
I get it. Wine drinking is effete, cricket is effete — bingo, a joke!
Stick at it; you may be the next Larry David.
Great, step 2 is learning to take one.
The Man Wall should be… nothing. Real men are creatures of the outdoors – hunters, fishers, ball players, runners, cyclists, rock climbers, surfers, etc. Give me a camping trip over the Man Wall anytime.
Walt Whitman and Teddy Roosevelt were not men to be trifled with, and both of them extolled the virtues of a strenuous outdoor life. Besides, it’s a lot less expensive and consumerist; a Coleman stove, simple foods and beers, etc. costs far less than $15 grand.
Many of us have to stare at a screen all day at work; why do any more than absolutely necessary in our precious spare time?
@#29 Sweatpants00 – I couldn’t agree more. Anyone spending that amount of cheese on a front wall is surely willing to spend more cheese on the back of the room. Everyone knows that’s where the refreshments go.
I’m coming down on the side of Jay B in the Cricket Joke Affair. Graphite, while I’m sure a reasonable person in every other respect, needs to lighten up a bit.